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24小时爆笑笑话大全 - 糗事百科

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<h2>朋友你老婆有蛀牙</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">12</div>
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<span>童年点点滴滴：</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">3873</i> 好笑</span>
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<span class="cmt-god" >神评</span>

<span class="cmt-name">GG看看^O^</span>

<div class="main-text">：他妈的天天这个童年有没有做过，那个有没有做过，他妈的你们有没有吃过饭，这个也要点赞？</div>
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26

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<img src="http://pic.qiushibaike.com/system/avtnew/2903/29033142/medium/201609091435239.JPEG" alt="十八年前哥也十八"/>
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<h2>十八年前哥也十八</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">35</div>
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<a href="/article/117695179" target="_blank" class='contentHerf' >
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<span>好友爱的队形啊～</span>


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<img src="http://pic.qiushibaike.com/system/pictures/11769/117695179/medium/app117695179.jpg" alt="好友爱的队形啊" />
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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">314</i> 好笑</span>
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<h2>独孤SUN求败</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">26</div>
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<span>说实话，真的是这样！</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">1090</i> 好笑</span>
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<span class="cmt-god" >神评</span>

<span class="cmt-name">像罂粟入了我的骨</span>

<div class="main-text">：就像男人知道女人的丝袜里面包裹着大腿，也愿意慢慢的脱下，不愿意看着光溜溜的大腿，没穿丝袜……</div>
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13

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<span><img src="/static/images/thumb/anony.png?v=b61e7f5162d14b7c0d5f419cd6649c87" alt="匿名用户"/></span>
<span><h2>匿名用户</h2></span>
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<span>天蓬元帅，你肿么了</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">409</i> 好笑</span>
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<h2>凤栖舞</h2>
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<div class="articleGender womenIcon">20</div>
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<span>楼主嘴馋了，偷偷用外婆的手机给老妈发信息 : 闺女，妈想吃榴莲了，待会买一个回来！！万万没想到，我妈又只字不改的把这条信息转发给我...</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">17097</i> 好笑</span>
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<span class="cmt-god" >神评</span>

<span class="cmt-name">妳说过、太过鲜艳的爱情终将凋零</span>

<div class="main-text">：楼主一家人真逗，好想亲楼主一口[doge]</div>
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468

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<h2>南宮，柱流年</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">26</div>
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<a href="/article/117694144" target="_blank" class='contentHerf' >
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<span>跟前女友认识后，她家的狗就喜欢上了我家的狗，整天腻歪在一起，后来还整出了一窝小家伙。特么后来跟女友分手了，两只狗却依旧每天幽会…激情不减当初……！</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">8029</i> 好笑</span>
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<span class="cmt-god" >神评</span>

<span class="cmt-name">南宮，柱流年</span>

<div class="main-text">：我自横刀向天笑，笑完你就会知道，禽兽不如啊……！</div>
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263

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<h2>南宮，柱流年</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">26</div>
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<a href="/article/117694431" target="_blank" class='contentHerf' >
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<span>一天在办公室显得无聊，跟同事开玩笑，说如果有一千零一种死法，你们会选择那种，，，<br/>女同事不假思索的回答，“我想被爽死”……‖</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">4723</i> 好笑</span>
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<span class="dash"> · </span>
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<span class="cmt-god" >神评</span>

<span class="cmt-name">杨柳依依°</span>

<div class="main-text">：对于如此暗示，楼主立刻表示他想牡丹花下死[奸笑][奸笑]</div>
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<a href="/users/30294916/" target="_blank" title="入库君">
<h2>入库君</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">28</div>
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<span>我爹跟我妈逛街回家，我爹逮着我就骂，小兔 崽 子，再往楼下扔烟头，爪子给你剁咯！<br/>我当即反驳，你别冤枉我，我哪次不是躲厕所抽完，随手丢马桶冲走了！<br/>我爹“啊哈”一声，朝我屁 股上踢了一脚，果然是你在厕所抽的烟，让老 子替你背黑 锅，被你妈拧了一路耳朵！！</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">2952</i> 好笑</span>
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<span class="cmt-god" >神评</span>

<span class="cmt-name">真，假。难辨难分</span>

<div class="main-text">：果然是亲爹，套路深</div>
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18

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<h2>南宫空城℡</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">22</div>
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<span>跟女朋友一起在小吃街吃东西。。<br/>女朋友:你除了我真没有处过对象么？我:真没有，我就只有你一个。这时旁边一哥们说:大哥，跟嫂子吃饭呐。怎么又换了。。我:媳妇，我真不认识他，你你听我解释。。。</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">2078</i> 好笑</span>
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<span class="cmt-god" >神评</span>

<span class="cmt-name">南宮，柱流年</span>

<div class="main-text">：二楞子，没想到吧，让你上次这样坑我……</div>
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<div class="article block untagged mb15" id='qiushi_tag_117694395'>

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<h2>秋水&amp;无痕</h2>
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<div class="articleGender womenIcon">26</div>
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<span>小学时候暗恋同班一个帅哥，那天上学路上遇见了他，我就故意骂他一句想引起他注意。<br/>谁知这个撒比 追上来把我胖揍一顿。</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">3367</i> 好笑</span>
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<span class="cmt-god" >神评</span>

<span class="cmt-name">青岛吴彦祖i</span>

<div class="main-text">：你说金钱买不来时间？网管，加五块钱！你说金钱买不来爱情？丈母娘，这是我的礼金！你说我上不了神评？爹，右上角点一点！</div>
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<h2>You隔壁王炸</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">27</div>
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<span>今天一女同事穿了一条皮裤，黑色紧身那种，一男同事神经质的问了句“你裤子真亮，这也打鞋油吗？”</span>


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<h2>哦…哦…哦…哦…</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">26</div>
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<span>今天下了公交车，看到两个小学生骑自行车骑的飞快，有一个突然停下了，大喊着:“停下等我一会，我需要加个血。”说罢，从兜里拿出了辣条，津津有味的吃了起来……</span>


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<h2>南宮，柱流年</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">26</div>
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<span>朋友聚餐，一哥们喝高了，回到家发现家里没电，于是他麻溜的找来一锤子，一个劲的砸墙壁，说要 凿壁借光。。。<br/>隔壁的小少妇被吓了个半死……！</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">3626</i> 好笑</span>
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<div class="cmtMain">
<span class="cmt-god" >神评</span>

<span class="cmt-name">南宫桃宝</span>

<div class="main-text">：从此以后，他就迷上了这种感觉，然后越来越瘦</div>
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<img src="http://pic.qiushibaike.com/system/avtnew/480/4809894/medium/20151115234031.jpg" alt="吃不了兜着走了"/>
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<h2>吃不了兜着走了</h2>
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<div class="articleGender manIcon">27</div>
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<span>晚饭后和女友散步，突然感觉下雨了，出于心疼她，我背你吧；不要，你想把我当伞……</span>


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<span class="stats-vote"><i class="number">1898</i> 好笑</span>
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<span>和朋友在一起喝酒聊天，听朋友说他认识一个矿主，虽才四十多岁，却为自己的后事大兴土木，他选块风水宝地，给自己修建豪华墓穴，过了一段时间，他问修坟的负责人，还缺什么吗？在一旁的民工小声嘀咕说，什么都不缺，就缺你了！</span>


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<span>老妈最近 出 台 新 规 定，我和老爸每人每周做一天家务，包括做饭，昨天刚好轮到我，我也不会做饭，就请二老去外面吃<br/>结果今天一大早，老妈“儿子，快！今天轮到你做饭了！”<br/>我“哎？我昨天不是请你和老爸去外面吃的吗，怎么又是我了？”<br/>老妈很认真的说，规 定 改 了，你一周做 2天，如果你不 想 做，可以去昨晚那个饭店!我。。。。额(⊙o⊙)…好吧！</span>


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<span class="cmt-name">拼命姑娘、、</span>

<div class="main-text">：你可以自己做一顿饭。他们就再也不敢轮到你做饭了</div>
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<span>爱情公寓里的吕子乔说:我已经拥有了有钱人所有的气质，现在就差钱了！<br/>忽然感到我也是呢:我已经拥有了美貌的人所有的气质，现在就差美貌了！</span>


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<span>上班起床晚了，赶紧打同事的电话，探探虚实，电话刚接通，同事开口就骂，xx，你特么烦不烦？大早上打扰我睡觉！<br/>我心里一喜，这厮绝逼记错了上班时间，哈哈哈，怕个毛，反正有垫背的，继续睡！<br/>结果，我被处分了，同样是睡觉，同事是趴公司办公桌上睡，我特么是躺床上睡！！</span>


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<span>早上在跳绳，二货闺蜜来我家串门。哎，你居然可以跳绳！“我跳绳怎么了”二货“我胸大，跳绳胸会痛”草泥马，一万点暴击伤害</span>


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<span>一次我迷路了。等了许久才来了个老头，连忙过去问道。老头白了我一眼，指着自己耳朵，颇为不悦。<br/>呀，我耳朵上还夹着朋友发的一根烟， 这是说我没礼貌呢！尴尬的递过去。他愣了下，接过烟抽了两口，又指着自己耳朵，嘴巴还咿咿呀呀的含混着。<br/>这次我算明白了，我就有那么好的运气，问道问了一个聋哑人。</span>


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<div class="main-text">：我会手语“我爱你”哦[奸笑]来，跟着小虎队一起唱:“把你的心我的心串一串，，”</div>
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